Memories

I was clearing my room and found some pieces of paper. Here's one I think written at the end of JC1.

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What I regret:

• Taking my family for granted
  
• Be too "busy" to spend time with God
  
• Being stupid enough to become obsessed with . . . somebody
  
• Never study
  
• Letting my life become so noisy I forgot to be quiet
  
• Actually forgetting to love the people around me 'cause I'm too busy having fun
  
• Mixing up all my priorities
  
• Didn't managed to do most of the things I was supposed to do
  

What is wrong with everything:

• I always take the Lord for granted
  
• Always take people who love me for granted
  
• End of the year coming and the 'thing' scheduled to happen hasn't because of me
  
• I look like shit
  
• I don't have time for everything but I don't want to disappoint anybody. End up I neglect some things and didn't do well in anything. And I'm not even sure I wanted to do those things in the first place
  
• I'm really tired. I need a break. I need time to . . . just be quiet. To think. So I don't "lose it"
  
• Sometimes I forget why I'm doing what I'm doing
  
• Sometimes when I lose sight of my goals, I lose sight of my way as well
  
• Sometimes, I do wonder a bit whether things will work out after all. Though I do now they will. But just sometimes, they just don't look very possible. And . . . sometimes I just feel too tired to make them happen. Or even try to make them happen.
  
• I hope everythin works out.
  

If only . . .

• My family comes to know the Lord
  
• I can pray with people and . . . everything that should happen happens in good time.
  
• Yvonne and Suying . . . see that they see. And know that they see, and all that.
  
• Elly, Belinda and Danica grow "tall and strong". I think Danica can lah.
  
• Me learnt to "love and pray"
  
• I don't look like shit anymore
  
• I get good enought 'A' level grades, go U, than next, next and next, . . .
  
• Somebody will . . . go out with me, and all that and all that . . .
  
• I won't ever say "I forgot", "I don't dare", "I can't", and all that anymore.
  

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Have to say was surprised to read this . . . . Well, things haven't changed that much since then right? Most of the things haven't changed that much. Maybe it means I haven't changed that much?